I met NJ and her wonderful blog, A Cookie Before Dinner at the blogging/writing conference I attended in June. She is one of those women whom you immediately want to know more about over coffee. We never did get a moment to have that coffee at the conference, but NJ does this really neat monthly blog post that is a peek into her life, I felt like we finally had that cup of coffee. I asked NJ if she would mind if I adapted her idea for my own blog, and she said go for it! Thank you NJ for your generosity, inspiration, and friendship.
I know I have not written much, and I feel out of touch with myself and all of you my good friends. I have tried to ease back into writing – and well, even now I feel like I am hitting a wall. I spent time brainstorming in my writing journal about what I would share if we were having coffee, and I think I am ready to sit down and catch up. So here is what I am…
Reading: Just finished “Perspective: The Calm Within The Storm” by Robert J. Wicks. I took my time with his book, read parts of it two and three times. Life changing lessons. He has taught me to examine my rough edges with curiosity rather than judgement, to gently embrace post-traumatic growth. I read “Bird by Bird” by Anne Lamont. Love her, love the book. I am reading “Rising Strong” by Brene Brown, sometimes I just have to stop and let what I read sink in. I am recognizing I am in the “messy middle” of change and growth and that’s okay.
Cooking: I spend a lot of time cooking and meal planning. Whole foods take more time and I am trying to honor our bodies and the gift of food by treating both with care. I love how the cooler temperatures invites the warmth of the oven and stove.
Baking: Whole grain bread and rolls, perfecting cookie recipes. I seem to always find myself coming back to having a batch of biscotti waiting in tins on the table for a quick not-so-sweet treat to go with coffee.
Fostering: I have two adorable kittens that we are fostering. Truly some of the sweetest and even-tempered kittens I have met – and I have met a lot. I thought they would adopt out quickly, but I have stipulated that the sisters be adopted together, they are a bonded pair and I also don’t believe in declawing. Some may say, “they are just cats and you should be happy that they find any home.” I think that a load of patronizing BS. They are God’s creatures, their lives important to him. Their lives are important to me.
Struggling: With the blinding, brilliant colors of fall. This is the first year since Justin’s death that I see color and it hurts, the depth and vibrancy of the reds and oranges. The curtain of grey is lifting and at times I miss that damp, clingy web of grey, color hurts. My camera sits untouched, I know I don’t want to capture the beauty of fall this year. Struggling with want – I want my child.
Learning: I am just finishing up my second writing class and have signed up for Brene Brown’s “Living Brave Semester.” I have met many kind and interesting people through on-line classes, the challenge and discipline has been good.
Thinking: On the hamster wheel, off the hamster wheel, on the hamster wheel, off the hamster wheel…
Hoping: I hope that those loved ones I saw off this morning, walk back through the door this evening. Tired, hungry, and that they can feel in their bones the peace of being home. That this small footprint of walls and floors be a refuge from the noise of the world.
Projects: Begin to incorporate revisions on my latest writing project and resubmit it for critique. And write a piece that has been on my heart since the summer, the story haunts me, accuses me of ignoring it, whispers of my betrayal to authenticity, it needs to be written. Written with no worries about publication, or exquisite sentence structure, or even decent punctuation – birth is messy, I am tired of trying to present a spotless delivery room.
I literally just finished my cup of coffee, so I will finish this note and get on with the day. Thank you for sharing a cup of coffee with me. I would be honored to hear about your day, your month, your dreams, your grey webs, what ever is on your heart.
Love, Terri
Just the right thing to read on this wet morning when I have to reschedule everything because of weather. It makes me appreciate those finer little things.
Hi Andrea! I hope you had an okay day, rescheduling is one of my least favorite things to do! Thank you for visiting!
I’m so glad you’re writing and sharing. Since we can’t get together over coffee, this is perfect. You teach me so much. Thank you.
The “grey” can be so inviting…the numbness, the fog, no need to think too much or do too much (or anything at all). It’s this soft fabric that covers the windows and extends to the bed. You wrap yourself in it and disappear into the darkness. It’s easy and uncomplicated, requiring nothing, as you sink down into it’s welcoming folds.
Color brings contrast; life/death, joy/misery, strength/brokeness. Colors show us time is passing and call us to live as brightly as they are. It’s an enormous and often exhausting undertaking. So I try, baby step by baby step, to go into the light. Sometimes it’s one step forward and two back but with the loving support of family and friends, I slowly creep closer to those frighteningly bright colors that demand that I LIVE. Today, I choose life. Tomorrow will happen tomorrow. Love you so much.
Baby steps, yes. Thank you for your encouraging words. I love you too!
How we survive heartache is what touches my heart..❤️
Here is to survival and coffee, lots of coffee. Thanks for the visit Nancy.
I never considered how seeing color again would be anything but delightful- never considered it could feel like an assault on the senses. You always give me much to think about. I so appreciate your authenticity- your vulnerability– both take tremendous courage. Your writing is artful, beautiful and reaches right into the soul. What a gift you are. <3
Your words of encouragement are gift to my soul. Thank you, Love you.
Cheers to the deliciousness of caffeine!! There is an appreiciation of the little things…
Hi Monica, I sometimes start dreaming about my morning cup of coffee the night before! Thank you for your visit, I hope you have a wonderful weekend.
that was a great way to share a little bit about yourself and your life – I loved reading it and now I want those kittens!
Thank you so much Leanne! Thank you for your visit and kind words. Oh, those kittens are so adorable, dangerously so. I keep thinking they maybe the ark can stretch, but we are pretty full. I hope you have a wonderful weekend. Thank you again for stopping by.
It is so funny that I grabbed a second cup of coffee before I started reading your blog! Your words are heartfelt and have left an imprint on my heart. Thank you……
I like your style Ellen! That second cup of coffee is sometimes even better than the first! I am humbled by your words, thank you. Thank you for taking the time to visit and share encouragement. Wishing you a peace filled evening.
Living Brave Semester by Brene Brown? I have to check that out. Sounds phenomenal! I love everything she shares.
Great post!
Hi Jyl! I have only discovered Brene Brown and it is like meeting a good friend. I love that the course does not start until January and that she builds a break in between the two six-week sessions. I am looking forward to it. I hope that you get a chance to check it out! Thank you for taking the time to visit and share a moment, maybe I will see you in “class.” Wishing you a wonderful weekend.
I feel like I just shared a cup of coffee with you. Wishing you strength and peace, Terri, and I look forward to reading more of your writing.
Dear Helene, thank you for taking the time to visit! And thank you for your kind words of strength, peace, and encouragement. Wishing you a very peace filled weekend.