The Best Medicine…ever.

Four days with Ryan…four unhurried days of kitchen talk, dining room table visits, a rare lunch out…a shopping adventure in Home Depot…a visit to the Shrine of St. Anthony, incense and kneeling on cold stone…perfection.  A very fun family gathering, the joy of

hearing his voice in the other room  as he visits with his uncles.  This is the only the third time that we have seen him since Justin’s death 15 months ago and never like this…no rigid schedule, just furry cats and way too much coffee.  I couldn’t take my eyes off him…watching the play of light on his face, catching fleeting glimpses of a young Doug, sometimes Justin in his expressions…so handsome, so grown up all of a sudden. The cats weaved themselves silly around his legs, the large furry one begging to be picked up.

There was a half moment when Ryan, completely unaware, had stood in front of the large picture we have of Justin, just enough left of center so that from where I was sitting it looked like the two of them together again…standing shoulder to shoulder…both smiling…and my heart took a picture.  The moment passed, beautiful in its serendipitous brevity…unstudied, unplanned, not carefully coordinated…a gift from heaven.

Four days that passed by all too fast, so grateful for those moments of looking out the window and seeing he and his dad out by the Gt, catching sight of a head on the couch with dark red hair, that patiently endures a kiss from a mother who can’t walk past that opportunity, those moments are the jewels of life that are worth collecting, rare and finely faceted, pure in color, saved in a mother’s heart.